Planning the Perfect Proposal!

Wedding etiquette is often unspoken about in the modern ages. It can be uncomfortable for some, and often many avoid talking about the subject. Traditionally, or many years ago, etiquette was that the bride’s family pays for the wedding and the groom’s family pays for the wedding rehearsal. But, folks – times have changed and what we know as etiquette or historically done has gone out the window. In today’s society, weddings are truly a reflection of who the couple are and what their values are. Etiquette varies from couple to couple. So, today – we’re here to discuss what is the modern wedding etiquette in 2024-2025. Is there still a “desired” way to throw a wedding? 

#01: Wedding Attire: 
What is wedding attire like these days? Are bridal party members still in matching dresses that always seem to be outdated? There is no right or wrong with what attire works for you. Many brides opt for dresses that are out of the box, or reflect their personality. As long as your attire is appropriate for your wedding event and fits your aesthetic, we vote to wear it. As for your wedding party, select pieces that are timeless and tie into your wedding theme and vision. Many couples opt for their wedding party to select their own pieces, but with a specified color. We love this idea because it allows your wedding party to select pieces that are comfortable to them and pick something they will hopefully invest in and wear again. 

#02: Provide Food and Drink 
This is still a time ole’ tradition that is still proper etiquette. You need to ensure that your guests are fed and have great options for food and drink. When guests attend a wedding, yes they are looking forward to celebrating the happy couple, but they also want to leave with happy bellies. You want to ensure that you’ve selected a caterer, menu, and drinks that will leave your guests feeling satisfied and that there will be plenty to go around. You never, ever want to run out of food, or leave your guests hungry for more. Ensure your guests have plenty of food and drinks, including non-alcoholic, too! 

#03: Who Pays for What? 
We are all for shared costs. Whether you and your partner sit down and create your wedding budget with just the two of you, or you ask your families to share the overall cost of your wedding… in today’s modern era, there is no reason for the bride’s family to take on the cost of the wedding. Create a safe opportunity for your families to get together and have a candid conversation to create the budget and determine what everyone is comfortable chipping in for. Or, if you and your partner want to cover the bulk of the cost, but maybe the bride’s family covers attire or decor. Don’t expect your wedding to be paid by anyone, unless it has already been predetermined. 

#04: Just Say No to Obligation 
Weddings can create a lot of feelings of obligation and big emotions. But, the bottom line is you don’t need to do anything out of obligation or tradition. You don’t need to invite everyone from the office, or your parents’ friend of a friend. Do not invite people that you don’t love, don’t share or celebrate your love, or will cause unwarranted stress. You can also curate your timeline to fit your wants and needs. If you don’t want to toss the bouquet, don’t do it. If you want to cut your first dance in half, then do it! This year, let’s create the trend of saying no to things that don’t suit you and creating healthy boundaries. You do not have to invite people or create moments during your wedding day out of obligation. 

#05: Leave the Drama Behind 
It is okay to have conversations with your family and friends to leave the drama at the door. Weddings or any large family events can bring drama. Set boundaries with your friends and families and create expectations for behaviors. It is so important to explain what you need to feel and be supported. You don’t want to create any unwanted stress and don’t want your loved ones bringing stress to your wedding day. Keep it simple and be up front with drama and limit any stress that may head your way! 

#06: Send Thank You Notes
This is a time old trend that needs to stay. Many people may think that thank you cards are a thing of the past, but in fact this is a wedding etiquette tradition that needs to stay. Please send a thank you card to your guests. Thank them for their time and acknowledge the gifts that they have given you. This not only acknowledges your guests, but it shows your appreciation for their time, support, and gifts. You never want your guests to have a sour taste in their mouths post wedding and you always want others to be appreciated. 

#07: Consider your Guests 
Weddings are truly a celebration for all. Yes, they are celebrations of the couple, but you bring everyone together to celebrate love. Your guests are the foundation of your wedding event. Everything you decide should not only align to your wants but also keep your guests comfortable. You never want your guests to feel not welcomed or uncomfortable. Keep your guests in mind as you plan and be considerate of their needs. Consider what your guests are doing during the wedding and ensure they are comfortable throughout. 

#08: Be Present 
Be present on your wedding day. You don’t need to be the queen or king of the party or feel the need to be everywhere at once, but be present for your guests and yourselves. Take time to enjoy your wedding, let the vendors and wedding coordinators focus on executing all the details. Focus on enjoying your newlywed bliss and enjoying your family and friends. Let your energy soar and enjoy your wedding day. 

There are so many traditions in the wedding industry and for some reason as soon as couples get engaged all these traditions flood their mind. Everyone seems to have an opinion on what is right and what is wrong, but at the end of the day, your wedding is for you and your partner. The wedding etiquette we’ve discussed isn’t for everyone, but they are our suggestion for modern couples in this modern time. Whatever you and your fiance choose, or implement, as long as you make the decision together – that is what matters. Happy planning all! 

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Lori Losee is the owner of Elegant Affairs, a Seattle Wedding Planner with over 19 years of experience. We create awe-inspiring experiences—Events filled with meaning and refined elegance. Behind the scenes, our experienced team collaborates on each stage of the process, executing your vision and a wedding, celebration, or corporate event that is unique to you.

Modern Wedding Etiquette: 8 Key Tips for 2024-2025 Couples

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So you are ready to pop the question and plan your engagement. If this is you and you’re ready to propose to your significant other, congratulations! Luckily for you, we’ve been in the business for just about two decades and know a thing or two about pulling off the perfect engagement. There are many different ways to propose. For myself, my now husband proposed randomly one evening when I least expected it. If you’re not the last minute or spur of the moment kind of a guy or gal, planning the engagement and proposal process is the way to go. We’ve compiled a few steps that can help alleviate the stress and plan the perfect proposal and engagement.

#01: Create the Diversion Plan 
If you’re a thrill seeker or even enjoy an element of surprise, you’d want to create a plan that will get your significant other out of the house and out and about to your desired location. You may want to create a plan, or diversion, that isn’t too crazy or out of your normal element. Let’s just say – if you want it to be a complete surprise, we recommend creating a normal backstory or idea. Maybe sky diving isn’t the way to go, especially if it’s out of your normal element. 

#02: Think Ahead 
Think ahead about what kind of proposal you’d like to create. Do you want family in attendance? How do you want to document or do you even want to photograph the moment? Many couples opt for hiring a professional photographer, or even having their family in on the plan to capture the moment. Talk to your loved ones about creating a plan and discuss if family and friends will be involved in the moment, or will stay hidden until after you pop the question. 

#03: Take a Pause 
If you are the one doing the proposal, it may seem like time drags or slows down. But, when you do take a knee, stay down on your knee for as long as possible, as long as it continues to be natural. This will allow your family, friends, and even photographer to capture the moment. It will also allow your significant other to soak up the moment. We recommend you count to 5 (1 mississippi…2 mississippi… etc.) and then pop up. The pause will allow your finance to soak up the moment too. 

#04: Try it on for Size 
We always suggest taking a current ring of your loved one down to the jewelry to ensure the sizing is right and if you aren’t sure of your loved ones size, you can purchase a ring size adjuster! These are metal or plastic adjusters that will go on their ring and allow them to wear it as is until you can take it down to the jewelry. The quickest way to ruin the proposal is for the ring not to fit, whether it is too small or too big. 

#05: Post Proposal 
Take time to celebrate and plan something afterwards! Whether it is just time for you and your partner to celebrate, or you want to celebrate with your loved ones, take the time to enjoy the moment and create memories as an engaged couple. So, pop the bubbly, and spread the word with your loved ones. Take time to Facetime your parents and family and then meet up for a dinner. 

#06: Don’t Rush 
After you’ve said “Yes!” it is OK to take your time. Do not feel like you have to immediately rush and cross things off your list. We recommend keeping your engagement around a year to have ample time for planning and to limit stress. One of the first items you can check off your wedding planning list is to set up a consultation with a wedding planning company. We always suggest determining your budget and/or meeting with a wedding planner first to begin the process.

#07: The First 1-2 Months
A good rule of thumb is to tackle one wedding planning activity or goal per month. You will want to accomplish a few tasks within the first few months including: hiring a wedding planner, selecting your venue and/or location, and creating a rough guest list to determine your budgets for the venue and caterer. Within the first month or two, it is the perfect time to schedule tours and start looking at preferred vendors. If you’re able to book your planner and venue within the first two months you’re moving at a good pace. 

#08: Tackling a Task a Month 
From there on out, we recommend you tackle a task or two a month. You want to begin booking your vendors 9-12 months out from your wedding date. As you begin to book, be sure to look at reviews, client testimonies, determine what kind of vendors you can have at your venue, and then book consultations or tastings. During this time, you’ll want to hire the following vendors: 

• Photographer 

• Videographer

• Florist

• Caterer

• DJ/Band and/or Entertainment

• Hair and Makeup 

• Paper Items (Invitations etc.) 

#09: Wedding Party Attire 
We recommend you start looking for your wedding attire, specifically your wedding dress, about 10 months prior to your wedding date. Many dresses, especially designer or boutique dresses can take months to make and/or order. Then, you will need ample time with your tailor to adjust the dress and/or attire as needed. Don’t go out and purchase the first dress you see, we recommend you take your time and shop. But, plan accordingly, shop early and select a dress that you know you’ll love down the road. Timeless is KEY! 

As your timeline continues, knock out items as your wedding day approaches. We highly suggest you meet with a wedding planner for assistance. They will help you create a detailed timeline and ensure you are staying on top of your wedding to do list. As your time as an engaged couple comes to a close, be sure that you are taking time to enjoy each other, soak up the moments, and that you can enjoy your time pre-marriage together. 

If you’re planning on getting engaged or are newly engaged, we’d love to hear from you! Reach out to a member of your team today! 

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Lori Losee is the owner of Elegant Affairs, a Seattle Wedding Planner with over 19 years of experience. We create awe-inspiring experiences—Events filled with meaning and refined elegance. Behind the scenes, our experienced team collaborates on each stage of the process, executing your vision and a wedding, celebration, or corporate event that is unique to you.

How to Plan for Unpredictable Fall Weather

Wedding etiquette is often unspoken about in the modern ages. It can be uncomfortable for some, and often many avoid talking about the subject. Traditionally, or many years ago, etiquette was that the bride’s family pays for the wedding and the groom’s family pays for the wedding rehearsal. But, folks – times have changed and what we know as etiquette or historically done has gone out the window. In today’s society, weddings are truly a reflection of who the couple are and what their values are. Etiquette varies from couple to couple. So, today – we’re here to discuss what is the modern wedding etiquette in 2024-2025. Is there still a “desired” way to throw a wedding? 

Fall is in the area, especially in the PNW! Now, here in the South the air is slowly starting to turn crisp. But that doesn’t mean that we should assume the weather will be predictable during the season of change! We love a fall wedding. What is there not to love? You have crisp air, cooler temperatures, seasonal decor, and well – let’s face it sometimes unpredictable weather. You may wake up and the temperature has dropped significantly, or the fog has rolled in from the water. No matter where you are, you will need to plan for unpredictable weather during any time of the year. But, today, let’s break down how to create a game plan for the unpredictable weather changes in the fall! 

#01: Have a Backup Plan
If you know us and have been a reader for more than a minute, you may be tired of us saying, have a back up plan! We cannot stress this enough. No matter what season your wedding will occur, you need a plan A and a plan B. And let’s face it, sometimes you’ll need a plan C! Whether or not you need to execute your backup plans, you’ll need to consider all the possibilities and what to do if the worst weather event occurs on your wedding day. If your venue is outside, consider holding your ceremony and reception inside if the weather changes. Or, contact local vendors to see if heating elements can be rented for the cold, or a tent can be purchased just in case. 

#02: Communicate! 
If you have a wedding website, or include an additional card in your invitation suite, you’ll need to communicate the potential weather changes with your guests – and vendors too! If you have guests traveling from out of town, give them a heads up on what to expect. Sometimes, even when I travel from the south, I forget that the North’s 60 degrees is COLD to me. I’m always rushing to the nearest store to bundle up. If you do create a backup plan, let your vendors know so that they can be prepared; especially your caterer and photographer! 

#03: Provide Comfy Items
Pre-plan and have some comfy items available for your guest. As the fall temperatures drop, consider having a basket or area where guests can grab a blanket, shawl, foot or hand warmers. This will allow your guests to remain comfortable throughout the duration of the wedding. 

#04: Prepare Appropriate Attire
We recommend letting your guests know if the venue is inside or outside and the weather for the season. You want to give your guests a heads up on what to bring and how to dress for the weather and location. For your wedding party, you may want to consider long sleeves, or cozy shoes, or even layering up with a cute shawl or jacket. If the weather is cold, have a plan for staying warm throughout the day or ways to quickly warm up.

#05: Consider the Florals! 
Flowers are sensitive to heat and cold. You will want to work closely with your florist to determine what flowers are appropriate for the fall season. We love seeing clients use festive florals like mums, dahlias, sunflowers, and eucalyptus. These are hardy to withstand both heat and cooler temps. You’ll want to ensure the florals you select can withstand any abrupt cold or hot temperatures as fall is often unpredictable!

#06: Consider your Decor! 
You can easily create decor that will support the unpredictable weather of fall. Along with tented receptions, you can add drapes to keep warmth in, add rich colors to tie into fall and incorporate meaningful decor pieces that will add warmth to your overall design scheme. And of course, select lighting that will set the mood for your wedding day and give a nod to fall. 

 #07: Plan your Start and End Accordingly 
We recommend planning your wedding times, according to the weather, specifically the temperatures and sunset. We love ourselves a sunset wedding, but we also know with fall, the weather cools drastically in the evening. As you plan and create your timeline, consider your guests and their levels of comfort as the night goes on. You also want to ensure that you are missing the heat of the afternoon. 

As you plan your fall wedding, you’ll need to keep in mind that the season is changing and you may need to alter and adjust your plans to meet those changes. Consider your guests and keep their comfort in your mind as your plan your wedding day. Ensure that they are safe from the elements and are comfortable throughout the night. Create your backup plan and provide comfort items for guests throughout the night, including the ceremony and reception. As you select your decor items, ensure they can withstand the cooler or spikes in temperature. Planning a wedding in fall can be unpredictable, but it you prepare you will be ready for anything! 

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Lori Losee is the owner of Elegant Affairs, a Seattle Wedding Planner with over 19 years of experience. We create awe-inspiring experiences—Events filled with meaning and refined elegance. Behind the scenes, our experienced team collaborates on each stage of the process, executing your vision and a wedding, celebration, or corporate event that is unique to you.