Wedding Etiquette: Speeches

This week we’re talking about speeches, and as someone who hates public speaking, this topic pretty much terrifies me. But I know that when I am asked to speak at a friend’s wedding, I will rise to the challenge and have a glass (or two) of bubbly before to calm my nerves.

Here are my top four suggestions for having the perfect wedding speech:

Say Yes: First and foremost, if you’re asked to speak at a wedding, you have to say yes. If you’re like me, from the moment you agree to it, to the moment you are standing up their speaking you will be freaking out, but you have to do it! You have to support your friends and family on their wedding day.

Let Your Personality Shine Through: Just be you! If you’re not funny, don’t try to be, if you’re not a crier, don’t worry about it! The bride and groom know you and want you to speak at their wedding so don’t worry about putting on a show. If you share your feelings about the couple and wish them the best of luck in their marriage your speech will be perfect!

Be Conscious of Time: This is one of the most important elements to writing a good wedding speech. Don’t make it too long, there are a lot of things to do during a wedding reception and there are most likely multiple speeches to get through so don’t hog the microphone! And on the other hand, don’t make it too short, you don’t want it to seem like you have nothing to say about the couple! Find a happy medium, usually somewhere between 2 and 3 minutes.

End with a Toast: Don’t forget your ending, encourage everyone to raise their glass and toast the happy couple!

And just like that, cheers, you are don’t with your public speaking for the evening!

Who Gets a “Plus One?"

When creating your guest list, plus ones are always a challenge. Let’s be real, at the end of the day you don’t want to end up with a bunch of Tinder dates at your wedding! So here are my tips for trimming down your guest list without leaving all your guests at the singles’ table.

1.       If they’re under 21 they don’t get a plus one

This is a general rule of thumb, but of course there are exceptions! But you can pretty much guarantee that if they are too young to drink alcohol they are too young for a plus one!

2.       Make sure the entire bridal party gets a plus one

Your bridal party is doing a lot for you and for your wedding so make sure you thank them with a plus one. This will keep them all happy and keep any single people from feeling awkward while surrounded by all of your married friends.

3.       If they rely on Tinder, they don’t get a plus one

Anyone who isn’t in a committed, or at least somewhat committed relationship doesn’t get a plus one. You are paying for every guest so wouldn’t you like each guest to be important to you? Your wedding should not be the venue for a first date!

At the end of the day, weddings are expensive and personal events. You don’t want to spend that day with strangers nor do you want to pay for a stranger’s meal! So be sure to keep plus ones in mind and who you are giving them too when planning your guest list.

How to write the perfect Thank You note!

Here is a simple template to follow in order to write a thank you note that your guests will appreciate! Most thank you notes we write and receive in our lives lack personalization and/or sincerity. Be sure to put thought and time into each note you write to show appreciation for the thought and time that your guests put into picking out your gift.

Opener: depending on your relationship, your opener can range in formality.

                                Ex. “Dear Mr. & Mrs. Smith”, or “Hi Sarah,”

  Express Thanks: In this section be sure to include specifically what this guest gave you.

Ex. “Thank you so much for the beautiful blue serving platter! We cannot wait to use it when we entertain this summer!”

Personalize the Note: Include a personal note about which event your guests attended or how grateful you are for their years of friendship. A thank you note can be about more than just the physical item they gave you.

Ex. “We were so happy you both could attend our wedding and we cannot wait to have your family come and visit us at our new home!”

Sign Off: match this to the formality of your opener.

                                Ex. “With Gratitude,” or “All Our Love”

Including a personal touch and sending your thank you notes out to your guests in a timely manner will ensure they feel appreciated!